he shaved USA in his pubs
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
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