Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
Remember when we got high off our ass and you talked me into running in place then punched me in the face and said it was a wall?
Ya, you were bleeding for an hour and a half
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
is it weird that i just witnessed the marriage of someone ive had sex with on multiple occasions?
Randomize