dude i dont realllllly have to fuck her do i? its just a mess down there and i think im gonna cry
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
he needs to hurry and make his mind up... i mean i can't keep getting peed on by a guy who isn't even my boyfriend
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize
