when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Aaaaaaaand dick pic. God bless america, and god bless tinder.
So I'll be starting a scrapbook from all the mugshots of the guys I've slept with
No way in hell. Unless I was drunk Tindering again....my swiping finger gets drunk too I guess
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
The clothing optional portion of the night began around midnight. Then we did disgusting things to each other. It was beautiful.
Randomize
