So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
He came over while I was in the ER and hung pictures of himself around my house.
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
336: Dude I lost my.phone Wednesday night at a party and just found it, three days later, on the lacrosse field....what the actual fuck.
I just found a samari sword in the couch. I'm about to take like 5 shots and pretend to be captain jack sparrow
Eaten today: granola bar, pumpkin donut, and fritos. Oh, college nutrition.
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
GOD DAMN IT I COULD HAVE HAD A MOTHERFUCKING 3 WAY LAST NIGHT. WHY BOOZE, WHY?!
Randomize
