apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
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