Haha no. But I cannot hook up with you anymore. Especially when you group text people.
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
It all boils down to, who else do we know that is willing to buy our friendship?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
I wish my bank account would intervene on my life choices.. $200+ in alcohol in 2 weeks and a $40 McDonald's bill is a cry for help.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
Randomize
