y did u give ur computer a hand job?
U of I kids don't fist pump to Sweet Caroline. Get me the fuck out of here.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
I don't care who it's from we're getting blown. It's a 3 day weekend anything can happen
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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