You know, as long as there were ice cream breaks, I would totally eat chips for a living.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
I wrote myself a letter, like I think drunk me wants to be pen pals or something
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Randomize
