You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
We sold so many girl scout cookies when we were little. What went wrong?
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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