You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
I don't even have to turn the heat on in my car. Just fart the whole way home.
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
It was dark, she woke me up, gave me a blowjob and then whispered in my ear: do you know who I am?
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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