We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Honestly I'm so excited to go to bed I feel as if I don't deserve to be in my early twenties.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
Randomize