I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
5% want to drink juice and feel better, 95% just want to touch your butt
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
