while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
I think I dropped my cock ring in your back yard
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
So ive narrowed my options down to getting food or masturbating. Don't judge me
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
A guy is going to be inside me and I'm gunna start singing "I am stuck on your penis, cause your penis is stuck in meeee!"
I got about 15 snapchats from you with your hand saying "you want cheese sticks" or something like that and one of some weird looking weed
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
The candles are lit, the magic circle is drawn, now all we need to do is get naked and see how many orgasms we can manage.
He said watch this and then went and tripped into a group of 40 year old women, now he's leaving the club with them.
Randomize
