He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
After a certain point, you just want to make it work. Prove to yourself that you're smarter than the vibrator.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize