I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize
