my vag is so smooth its legendary
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Accidentally peeing a little on the couch in the middle of a sneeze is way different from railing a random on our waffle counter. I am the better roommate.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
That's right. I did.
You are the saddest 25 year old gay man I've ever had the displeasure of knowing.
I got my dick out in a gay bar for just one free shot. I didn't know I could be bought so cheap
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
