so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I'm passing your future prison.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
Its a cash in stratch tickets to afford cigarettes and coffee kind of friday
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Randomize