It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
well tonys high enough to be moving from spot to spot around the kitchen shooting tortellini into a boiling pot and yelling "KING JAMES" whether he makes or misses it.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
