She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
my parents are out trying to convince the local liquor stores to post "do not sell our daughter alcohol" flyers. i'm preping my defense now.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
my boss made my mugshot into an 'employee of the month' poster.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
im just gonna lie here and collect money in this whoppers bag while sprawled out on this bench and explain that its to buy weed for my hangover
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
Randomize
