And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Our neighbors just passed us a blunt from their deck, and are hooking us up.
I just baked them cookies. We're friends now.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
wanna come over? I have movies.
sure, what movies
porn or disney, your choice
Until you can top getting paid to have women tell you to check out their ass, my job will remain better than yours
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Any luck with the purse?
No, though I did find her weed. Also her sons name is King. I'm uncertain how I feel about that
Randomize
