Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
You were so high that you only FaceTimed me so that you could stare into your own eyes and not actually say anything
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
