if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
June 16th my calendar just says boobietassels....I can only assume that has to do with you
You slid down the bannister into a split. Lines were crossed.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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