You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Yeah. I don't think I have anything left in me tho. I think I was throwing up tangible memories at one point.
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I worked all year for this tax return. I deserve to get my nipples pierced.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
