Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
We had sex this morning and after she goes, " So are we going to do something for Valentines Day?"
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Randomize
