Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Hey, do you know the person who woke me up last night at 1 in the morning yelling and being carried through the courtyard?
That was me Mom...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
My husband found the cock ring I bought my FWB. I told him it was napkin holder and he believed me. And that’s why I need a side dick
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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