If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
Blonde 1 is sitting on the floor crying and blonde 2 is asleep with her face in the toilet. This isn't what I had in mind when they asked me back
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
u girls! girls! girls! have fun please don't hook up w/ a roadie! Love, mom
At the party. I feel like I just walked into a lifesize blunt.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Sitting on the toilet ... Eatin pizza with one hand, petting my cat with the other. I love a sad drunken life
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
He sent me the milestone first dick pic this morning, it looked like a baby's fist holding a tree trunk. I'm frightened and aroused in equal measure.
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