Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Have you asked your drug dealer if he wants to see harry potter with you?
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
He insisted he brought his alarm clock everywhere, and then the girl screamed "fuck French people!"
Just wait til you visit, there will be an endless supply of fresh dick for your demand #economics
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
