Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
never play flip cup with pint glasses
I was 10 minutes late leaving for lunch today because I couldn't lose a boner. It is impossible to tuck it when your shirt is tucked in...gotta quit facebook stalking hot chicks at work
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
The only way I can describe the noise he makes when he has an orgasm: dying walrus.
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
Randomize
