talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
I'm drunk, laying in bed, eating macaroni salad. I dropped a piece and tried to pick it up with a fork. My cleavage is bleeding and I haven't been laid yet. Heeeyyyy!!!
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
