Holy cold harsh reality of sobriety batman
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
i barfeds in our rink
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
Decided to stop by the store on my walk of shame. I must really look like shit, a six year old girl just walked up to me and said "my mommy wanted me to tell you Jesus loves you." Thanks kid.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
I have to have boobs, you have the charm and wholesomeness that gets boyfriends... And i have boobs
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