You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
u think ur still drunk from last night? i just put the eggs in the freezer and the remote in the sink. I don't wanna fucking hear it.
people are starting to question the shark bite story
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
She is screaming bc she thinks you jumped out the window...please show her you just went out for a smoke
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
