I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
Can you have a quarter life crisis another time? I'm trying to masterbate.
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
