You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
I don't care how hungover you are were not listening to enya
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
