You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
Two of the boys I banged while living in that house are about to move into it hahhaaha
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
