why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
Nothin says happy bday jesus like a shot with your loved ones.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
Tonight is one of those "I'm wearing a shirt as a dress" nights because I need to get laid.
Thinking about adopting a 16 yr old here. Her name is Abby and she likes vodka. We've bonded. I need a sober driver n e ways...
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I slept on her porch...in her dads handcuffs
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
Weight watchers just said "you've tracked beer three times recently, want to make it one of your favorites?" I'm begining to understand why I needed to go in the first place.
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
Randomize
