girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
this vacation is helping with my sexual bucket list so much. threesome, deaf guy, and outdoor sex all accomplished.
Randomize
