Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
I just wiped my face with a slice of bread. Lowest point of the night.
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I fill condoms, not promises.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I mean, I would have, but I couldn't come up with a logical reason to bring up oral sex during an orientation.
You know you're good at multi-tasking if you can get a lap dance from someone while simultaneously eating a burrito.
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Are you coming over for scrambled eggs and hand jobs?
Randomize
