walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
I met him yesterday and now he's wanting to hold hands and kiss in public. i hate this
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
Best part: she drunkenly told me I'm dangerous then slurred to my parents that I should watch out in case I fall in love with her. Then she mounted a pinata
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
