This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Worse: texted mom-in-law by mistake that I sharted.
Worser: she offered to clean me up
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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