so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Don't blame me for eating all the ham.. I gave it out to people, so at most I'm guilty of ham distribution
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
We broke into the space center. If i go to jail I wanted to tell you, you have a fantastic dick. Use it wisely.
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
The feeling are messing with the penis
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
My knees are skinned from sitting on someone's face on concrete
It's all fun and games until your mom recognizes your bootycall from 2018 as her attorney
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