I feel like our house is getting pulled over.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
You have not lived until you have drunkenly grinded on your mother. Daughter of the year right here.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
If you're funny as hell and have a mustache, odds are I'm probably gonna fuck you
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
Here's to not getting arrested this year on thanksgiving again. Cheers bitches!
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Randomize