can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
your stepbrother is rimming his martinis with coke... keeps saying "thank god its tuesday". where does funemployment end and intervention begin?
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
Ugh. This is the type of hangover that all other hangovers want to grow up to be.
Well, most of my extended family doesnt know about my love for the penis, so they dont have a reason to disown me
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
I said I hate kids.This dude said he will sell his children to go on a date with me.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
We havent had power for three days. What else is there to do besides drink and fuck? I thought that was obvious.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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