I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
Randomize
