he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
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