Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
how did we start talking about space blow jobs?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
He fell on top of me at a party. I slept with him a week later. We've been fucking for 2 moths. Most successful relationship ever.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
She just broke into my apartment while I was asleep, woke me up and drunkenly tried to seduce me for about 2 minutes, then passed out..
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
You just referred to a pillow with a stolen bra strapped to it as "she". Let that sink in for a minute.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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