hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
Remember when I got my car stuck in my backyard?
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
you wouldn't let anybody come in after ten. everybody was standing outside and you just yelled "BEING PUNCTUAL IS IMPORTANT" and slammed the door. i dont think you should be allowed to have parties anymore
it concerns me that i was already that drunk at 10
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
I'm at that stage of drunk where just imagining having sex makes me motion sick.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
