she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
I caught them hiding behind a car trying to have sex.
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
