either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
Hope you don't mind if I never tell my family about you.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
I think my pussy is going to freeze to the ground
Sorry for prompting a philosophical penis discussion at 10:45 on a Friday night.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Randomize
