kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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