This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
I have never pre-planed for a better sober morning than lacing my muffin batch with tylenol.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
