But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Turns out my drunken logic and wordsmithing isn't quite the same as the sober version. I'm pretty sure I made fun of the managers mom at one point
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
Sadly, she's the porn star that got away
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I couldn't find my contact solution so I thought mixing toothpaste and water would work
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
