I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
I had fun. Till he melissa etheridged my ass and came to my window.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
Trying to figure out why my back is hurting. And then I remember I got fucked up against a tree last night
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
he's single and there are thong briefs.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
