: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
just had sex in his gielfriend's bed, and puked all over it. i need to get out of here.
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
i really need to shower, but i don't want to take off my bra and lose my cleavage. the struggle
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
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